A BRIGHT SPOT

Earlier this year, the world was introduced to a young Afghan boy named Murtazi Ahamdi, who may well be the world's biggest Lionel Messi fan. His father could not afford a proper kit for Murtazi. Therefore, he made his son a replica Argentina "jersey" out of a blue and white-striped trash bag. The pictures went viral.

Once Messi heard about this story, he sent the boy real Argentina and Barca jerseys. However, that was just the beginning, and today Murtazi got to meet his idol and attend an exhibition match between Barca and the Qatari side Al Ahli in Doha.

As you can tell from the video below, Murtazi had to be pried from Messi, and I am sure it will go down as a day that both Murtazi and Messi will not soon forget.



Here's to one of life's bright spots in a very dark year!

TRAGEDY/TRAVESTY

The elections of 2008 and 2012 were joyous events in my home and the homes of many whom I love. In that sense, the election of 2016 could not be more foreign - truly a tragedy, a travesty.

How did we end up with President-elect Trump? I will leave that to the pundits like David Remnick from the New Yorker to describe. However, one thing is clear. Our democracy "worked." America got the president it desired and deserves, and walls like the one shown on the cover of this week's NewYorker may well start coming up.

As we do a post-mortem on this election, I want you to let a few numbers sink in:

231,556,622 eligible voters in the U.S.
25.5% voted for Trump
25.6% voted for Hillary
46.9% did not vote

Many of those who stayed home were minorities such as African-Americans or millennials. They had the most to lose with a Trump presidency, and yet they were not moved enough to let their voices be heard at the ballot box. Worse still, many of those who did show up voted for a third party candidate-essentially casting a vote for Trump. These "no" votes or wasted votes were enough to flip traditionally blue states like Michigan, Pennsylvania, and Wisconsin to Trump. I will never forgive these irresponsible Americans. Ever.

Moreover, nearly half the country looked the other way and apparently were comfortable with all of Trump's horrible words and deeds. How any woman, person of color, or human being with a conscience could cast a vote for him, I will never understand.

At this time though, we must look forward. Blame will not change the outcome of this election. Our goal must be to preserve the Union and prevent actions, laws, or movements that undermine the America that I know and love-a place built of diversity, tolerance, and hope.

The default position will be to throw up one's arms and give up or allow the fascists to slow erode our civil liberties and values. I will do everything in my power to resist that. How are some ways one can join the resistance, you ask? First, subscribe to a newspaper or magazine such as the New York Times, the Washington Post, or the New Yorker. Volunteer for progressive causes or campaigns so we can try to win back at least one house of Congress in order to provide some check on a Trump presidency. Vote, phone bank, and get involved with local issues and elections.

Most importantly, set a good example for your neighbors, friends, and loved ones and never let intolerance or injustice go unchecked. For if we do, that is the beginning of the end for our country as we have know it. Just ask Russians, Turks, and the British.

I will leave you tonight with the opening segment of last night's episode of Saturday Night Live.
That show did everything in its power this election season to bring to light the horrors of Donald Trump. Last night, the show struck a more somber tone when the actress Kate McKinnonn who played Hillary Clinton donned her pant suit one more time. In this segment, McKinnon sat at a piano and delivered a moving version of the song Hallelujah by Leonard Cohen who sadly died last week. The last verse was improvised but captured what so many Hillary supporters were feeling. After the performance, McKinnon was fighting back tears as she looked in the camera and exhorted us to not give up. I hope you feel the same way.

LEFT OUT BUT NOT KNOCKED OUT

The day after Halloween, Nicholas said he wanted to talk to me about something. As we sat together, he explained that things were "off" at school.

The prior week, three of his friends had been discussing a Halloween party at one of the kids' houses around Nicholas. Naturally, Nicholas thought he would be invited. However, it turned out that the boy organizing the party had not intended to invite Nicholas. At that point, Nicholas expressed his frustration and his hurt feelings. This did not resolve the problem.

According to Nicholas, things got worse from there. His three friends proceeded to ignore Nicholas and not respond to his repeated pleas about why he was no longer welcome and why they did not want to be his friend anymore. Nicholas shared all of this with me with tears in his eyes that he fought back and never shed.

Obviously, I was saddened to hear about how these boys had treated Nicholas. Because the boys are only 11, I did not think this would be resolved on its own. Therefore, I told Nicholas that we needed to get his teachers involved and that I wanted to talk with them when I dropped him off the next day.

When we went in to the school the following day, we found one of Nicholas' teachers. We asked if she had a minute, and then I asked Nicholas to tell her what had happened. Again, as he fought back tears that he never shed, Nicholas told the same story he had told me. The teacher had been unaware of what had happened, and she agreed to get more information and to try to resolve the situation. As I drove away from the school that day, I felt gutted.

Here was the sweetest and kindest person I know being hurt. Over the next few days, we were able to get more information from both the teacher and one of the boy's parents. The latter did not seem very concerned and even complained that the school should stay out of the kids' personal lives. To this, Kathleen retorted, the kids should not be discussing outside social activities that are exclusive, invite-only in front of other children who were not welcome. The mom had no response.

In the end, the ringleader boy and Nicholas' other sheep-like friends involved in the party explained to Nicholas that they "wanted to take a break" from being his friend. I explained to Nicholas that that was their right but that he also had the right to be treated with respect and kindness. We talked about how one's worth is not measured by how others treat us but rather by how one behaves and treats others. We watched a video about kindness that was excerpted from the author George Saunders' commencement speech on this same topic. I think it struck a chord with Nicholas.

I hope Nicholas realizes how special he is, and how the pause in their friendship is those other boys' loss. 

Adolescence is hard. Hell, life is hard at any age. However, I know Nicholas will get through this and that he will become a stronger person with an even greater sense of self-esteem and right and and wrong. That does not change the fact that his pain was unbearable to watch and that I would have done anything to try and make that pain go away for my sweet little boy.

ONE MAN'S WEAKNESS IS ANOTHER MAN'S STRENGTH

I often get on Nicholas' case about working harder, being more engaged, and giving his all. This is because that is largely the way I have approached life. My perspective is not without benefit, and it has no doubt helped me to get to where I am. However, this "type A" personality also has a cost. It is difficult to feel satisfied or to feel like one's work is ever good enough. Moreover, it is very easy to transfer one's own high expectations to other people who may not have the same perspective.

There is a lot to be said for being comfortable in one's ow skin and for not constantly feeling stressed out or motivated to do better and be better. I hope that Nicholas is able to find his own way and keep himself grounded while also reaching a bit beyond his comfort zone. Here's to growing up without feeling like giving up!

BRILLIANT RESPONSE

Last week, the New York Times responded to Donald Trump's threat to sue them for publishing his victims' stories with this letter. In a word, the letter was brilliant. Consider me a New York Times subscriber for life!

CAMPAIGN 2016- IS IT OVER YET?

This blog started out as a forum for politics and the election of 2008-hence the name 270. However, I have not written much about the election this year. This is because this has been the most depressing and out right depraved election of my lifetime. Never before have I considered whether to allow my children to be present during nightly news coverage or during debates. In that sense, this year is like no other.

It is not just that Donald Trump is irredeemable and deplorable, but also that he has been allowed to skate by without appropriate vetting or press oversight. Fortunately, the press, namely the New York Times and Washington Post, have recently stepped up their reporting and have broken several important stories about the depths to which this man has sunk in his "interpersonal relations."

I hope America, or at least 270 electoral votes worth of Americans, is paying attention. There is no choice in this election beyond Hillary Clinton, who is quite literally the most qualified person to run for President. I hope to be celebrating with you on November 8th quite early in the evening. If not, I will see you in Canada!

LIVING IN THE TRUMP ERA

Last week the Republicans nominated Donald Trump to be their candidate for President. It was a frightening moment and quite unbelievable that the "Grand Old Party" would make a hack, a reality TV star, and a bigot their standard bearer.Understandably, many Americans like me are worried about the prospect of a Trump presidency and what it will mean for those who are the "other" or in the minority.

This past weekend Nicholas and I went to Starbucks. When I parked, I told him to be careful opening its door because we were parked close to another car. I got out of the car and headed to the Starbucks. When I looked behind for Nicholas, I saw that the woman in the car next to us had gotten out of her car. She looked at me and scowled, "He banged his door into my car." I stopped and apologized to her. Nicholas was taken aback and appeared quite upset.

As we made our way to the Starbucks from the parking lot, I unloaded on Nicholas. I reminded him that I had warned him to be careful. I told him that the car next to us belonged to someone else and that he had made her very angry by being careless. What I didn't tell him was that I was worried that this white woman and white people in general would react to experiences like that to develop negative opinions about people who look like us.

After we got our drinks, we knocked on the woman's window. I apologized to her and asked Nicholas to do the same. She also apologized for "flying off the handle" and said that she had been on a very important phone call and was surprised to hear her our car door hit hers. We left on good terms, and I felt better knowing that we had not alienated this woman.

Whether Trump wins or loses, I do feel as though people of color like me need to always put their best face forward to avoid alienating strangers. It only takes one bad experience to create a stereotype, and I do not want to give people that misperception.

That night during bedtime stories, I explained to Nicholas why I was so upset and what I was worried about. He said he understood. However, in many ways, I hope this sweet, eleven year-old boy, who has never experienced, racism does not understand. I hope Nicholas grows up in a city, a country, and a world where he is judged by the content of his character and not the color of his skin as Dr. King hoped for.

Here's to our future America. Do not screw this up!

DEMAGOGUE

Demagogue- noun. A political leader who seeks support by appealing to popular desires and prejudices rather than by using rational argument.

If there is one word that captures Donald J. Trump, it is demagogue.

Tonight, the Demagogue's acceptance speech at the Republican National Convention capped off the end to an inglorious Republican primary campaign. During the past year, the Demagogue insulted and offended countless groups of people and individuals, sowed bitter discontent, and appealed to the worst in humankind. Thus, his hate-filled speech was a fitting end to one of the most mean-spirited and nasty primary campaigns I have seen in my lifetime.

The Demagogue claims that we are a country in decline that is overrun by "the other." By "the other," he means minorities, illegal immigrants, and poor people trying to game the system. Who is at fault for this? The mainstream political establishment on both the left and right. Who can save us? Only the Demagogue, of course.

We have heard this speech before on the campaign trail this year. We have also heard it in Nazi Germany, McCarthy era America, and in Communist and contemporary Russia. This line of "inspiration" appeals to our fears and our insecurities. It offers scapegoats and simplistic explanations for all that ails those who have been left behind in this 21st century.

For many, especially those who feel disenfranchised in our increasingly diverse nation and global economy, these words are like a salve. However, rather than a poultice, these words are as likely to heal or fix our wounds as sulfuric acid. My only hope is that more Americans are repulsed by his message than those who would swallow his empty promises.

I am not a religious man. If I were, I would pray for our country to do the right thing to reject the hate and dark cloud that the Demagogue would invite upon us. There has never been a more important election in our nation's history, and I do not look forward to the bumpy ride for the next three and a half months.

May we prove him wrong and show the world what America really stands for.

THE TRYOUT

Cate has been playing soccer since the age of two. However, she has always played recreational soccer with the exception of her competitive futsal team.

Last spring, many of the girls from her recreational team decided to try out for the competitive team, but Cate said she wanted to stick with rec. All of those girls were accepted to the competitive team, and it was only afterwards that Cate realized that most of the friends from her rec team would not be back.

This must have really been on Cate's mind because one day she announced that she really wanted to try out for the competitive team. We explained to Cate that the tryouts had already passed, but she asked us to see if she could attend practice and try to make the team. Therefore, I contacted the coach.

When contacting him, I described Cate's history and the fact that she always played "up" one year. I left it to him to decide which team she should try out for. After some back and forth, we decided Cate should attend the practice of the team of girls one year older than her. Importantly, most of Cate's friends from her old team were in that age group.

After the practice, it was clear to anyone who had eyes that Cate belonged out there. The coach expressed his enthusiasm and said that she had an understanding of the game and skill that were quite uncommon for a player of his age. He offered her a spot, and Cate nodded her head in gleeful acceptance.

I am glad that this tryout worked out for Cate. It was a good lesson about hard work, focus, and making the most of one's opportunities. I cannot wait to see Cate play with this team and to build soccer and team skills that will last a lifetime.

US NATIONAL FUTSAL CHAMPIONSHIP

Last weekend, we headed to San Jose to watch Cate and her futsal team play in the US National Futsal Championships. The girls had been playing with each other for nearly a year, and they earned their ticket to San Jose by winning a regional tournament in the Winter.

We knew going in that the competition would be tougher here and that the girls might feel overwhelmed by the moment. We were right about the former but dead wrong about the latter.

While we lost our first game, the girls put in a spirited display and never gave up in their 3-1 loss. In the second game, we were better, but several dubious refereeing decisions gave the other team a 4-2 win. Nonetheless, one could see the girls' confidence and comfort levels building.

In our final game, we came out of the gates firing and never let up. Cate was an attacking midfield maestro, and she had an incredible game. She set up one goal and scored two others en route to a 6-3 win. That win gave us third place in our group, which is quite a feat considering that most of the girls on our team were playing up one year in a higher age bracket.

Even more important than finishing third and receiving medals, our girls saw what they were capable of when they worked as a team and gave it their all. San Jose is a tournament I shall not soon forget, and  hope our girls feel the same!

SUPER FIRST HALF SEES ARGENTINA THROUGH TO THE QUARTERS

Nicholas Alumkal

Seattle, WA

In Seattle at Century Link Field on June 14 Argentina faced Bolivia and outclassed them 3-0. Argentina had a great start to the game as they scored early at the 13th minute from a spectacular free kick by Erik Lamela. Ezequiel Lavezzi doubled their lead two minutes later. Victor Cuesta made it 3-0 before halftime.

At the half, Argentina made two substitutions, including bringing on Lionel Messi for Gonzalo Higuain. The second Messi came on, Bolivia were double teaming or even triple teaming him. Therefore, Argentina just passed the ball around, dominating possession. At one point, Messi got through on goal. He actually got behind the keeper on the end line and passed the ball through the keeper's legs, a move called a "nutmeg."Unfortunately, Messi was called offside on his initial move.

All in all, it was a spectacular game. I am super happy I got to attend it. GO ARGENTINA!

TOO LITTLE, TOO LATE

Nicholas's coach from his former club that recently cut him contacted us yesterday. He said that several boys decided to not continue with the program, and he wanted to offer a Nicholas another opportunity to play with the club.

I asked Nicholas for his thoughts before responding. He said, "I have my new club, and I would rather play with them." I agreed with Nicholas. So I emailed his old coach back thanking him but explaining that Nicholas was now a member of a different club.

After all the heartbreak, who would have thought that our little guy would have ended up being so sought after?!

SECOND CHANCE

One gets a second chance sometimes in life. After having been cut from his former team, Nicholas' second chance came in the form of a tryout with a different soccer club in Portland. This second opportunity came about after I discussed Nicholas' plight with several parents. Having seen him play, these parents expressed incredulity that Nicholas was not selected by his former club. These parents encouraged me to contact other clubs in town and inquire about the possibility of a formal tryout, even though the deadline had passed.

I discussed this possibility with Nicholas, and he said that he knew there were no guarantees but that he would love to have another shot at making a competitive team. Therefore, I decided to contact a nearby club, and they agreed to have Nicholas come out.

The first night, Nicholas was assigned to practice with the "A" team. The little guy held his own and played much more aggressively and focused than I am used to seeing. After the trial, the coach said,"I think I see something, but I am not sure. Can Nicholas come out one more time?" I said yes and felt encouraged by Nicholas' performance and the coaches comments.

I was out of town for the second day of Nicholas' tryout and was worried that the little guy might get his heart broken twice. However, Nicholas did not fail to impress, and he was selected to play for the new club. Needless to say, my boy was ecstatic, and we celebrated with donuts from a nearby shop!

I do not take any credit for Nicholas making the team. I also do not feel as though I overstepped my bounds by inquiring about a tryout. In my mind, this was not helicopter parenting. Rather, I merely tried to create an opportunity for Nicholas to try to succeed. His success came down to him and him alone though.

We will rejoice in this moment - particularly after realizing how Nicholas learned two valuable lessons through this tryout process. He learned about dealing with life's disappointments and adversity. However, he also learned that resilience pays off and that sometimes one is given a second chance. Without loss, can one every truly appreciate victory? Without resilience, can one ever get up the nerve to try again? I think we know the answer to both those questions for my boy!

MESSI IS BACK WITH A HATTRICK!

Nicholas Alumkal
Portland, OR

The greatest player in the world was sidelined with a back injury for there weeks. However Lionel Messi made a statement Friday in his first game back against Panama whom the albiceleste (Argentina) beat 5-0.

The scoring started in the seventh minute with a diving header by defender Nicolas Otamendi . Things got worse for Panama as they went down to 10 men when Anibal Godoy got sent off at the 31st minute. Despite the sending off, the game was pretty even until Lionel Messi came on and changed the game very quickly.

Messi scored a hattrick in the space of 19 minutes, as the Argentinians marched away from Panamanians. At the 90th minute Kun Aguero put the final sprinkle on Panama's cookie with a powerful headed goal, Argentina's fifth, to end the game 5-0.

A SPECIAL GUEST

Last week the Copa America and European Championship tournaments started. To channel Nicholas' passion for soccer and his artistic creativity, I suggested he write short articles with accompanying illustrations. Nicholas thought about it and was a little hesitant because he viewed this as "work." However, he quickly agreed and said he thought it would be fun. Therefore, keep your eye out for 270's first guest blogger and chief soccer correspondent, Nicholas J. Alumkal!

A LIFE LEFT UNFINISHED BUT LIVED IN FULL

Tonight, the Arbor community received word that one of its parents - Kara Larson - passed away after a year-long battle with cancer.

I did not know Kara until her diagnosis, but afterward I had the pleasure of meeting her and her husband John. Kara's vitality and their love for each other was very powerful, and I was truly inspired every time we met or spoke. Their son Will rides the bus with our kids, and he always struck me as a very quiet but kind soul. Unlike your average seventh grader, he was also coping with his mom's illness, but his attitude and his demeanor were always very level. That is as much a tribute to him as to his parents and their unconditional love for him.

I lose patients all the time, but it never gets easier or becomes rote. This is because each patient is an individual who had his/her own hopes and dreams and story that is still unfolding. While I was not Kara's doctor or know her well, I know that she was someone who made a big difference - in the lives of her family, her friends, and customers of her dress and toy shops in Northeast Portland. Hers is a tale that remains unfinished and that was sadly cut short. However, I know that Kara will live on through John and Will and that Kara knew that there could be meaning in her death. In fact, the message announcing her passing included an exhortation to "be more present, spend more time with family, and follow our dreams." What more is there in life, really?

Today, even before receiving word of Kara's passing, I came home early from work. This was because Nicholas had sent me a text message that he wanted to play together at the park. Nothing seemed more important than that at the time, and I am so glad I came home to him.

I know that life is too short for us all and that life is until further notice. Because of that, we must make the most of the time we have together and treat each other as though each encounter may be our last. I think that is something Kara knew far before she became ill, and it is a message that no one has made more clear to me than Kara through her words and deeds.  I promise we will look out for your boys and that we will heed your words and follow your example Kara. May you rest in peace.

ANOTHER DAY, ANOTHER ASTONISHING PERFORMANCE

Barca won its 28th Copa del Rey trophy this past weekend, their fifth trophy of this season's campaign. It was a very different sort of victory because the team went down a player beginning in the 36th minute after Mascherano was justly sent off for a foul on a Sevilla forward right outside the box.

Barca did not have time to feel sorry for themselves and quickly organized into a makeshift lineup whose sole purpose was to defend. Again, it was a very un-Barca performance for a team that is most comfortable attacking with the ball.

The team held out, and the score was 0-0 at the end of 90 minutes. Shortly thereafter, Sevilla had a player sent off for a last-ditch challenge of their own, and then we found ourselves on a level playing field: 10 vs. 10. Barca then poured it on and fought hard to kill the game in extra time in order to avoid penalties. In the first of two overtime periods, Messi sent a beautiful 40 yard ball into the path of Jordi Alba, who was heading toward the goal. Alba deftly slotted the ball home, and the Catalans never looked back. Neymar added another - again set up by Messi - in the dying seconds, and we all breathed just a little bit easier.

It was unconventional. It was uncanny. However, it was also inspiring. This team found a way to overcome the most difficult of circumstances and triumphed once again. While I should not be surprised at this point, I am inspired. It almost seemed like they took a page out of Nicholas' book - resilience, pride, steel. Visca Barca!

RESILIENT AND GUILELESS

It has been over one week since Nicholas found out he was not selected for the competitive soccer team. Since the day after finding out, he has been doing remarkably well and seems to have realized that there are other important things in life.

On several occasions since then, grown-ups have inadvertently asked Nicholas whether he played soccer or how he was enjoying his competitive soccer experience. My heart skipped at beat on these occasions. However, Nicholas matter-of-factly answered that he used to play competitive soccer and that he recently tried out again but was not selected. There was no sadness in his voice or change in his demeanor. He simply stated the fact rather than seeming to make a shameful revelation.

I am so in awe of this young man who has the fortitude to not perseverate or ruminate on this most-disappointing of challenges. I am nothing like this unfortunately and cannot look past failures or misfortunes. I wish I had his strength, and I am truly inspired by Nicholas. No guile. No obfuscation. What you see is what you get, and what you get is one hell of a person - my best friend.

SURVIVING LIFE’S CURVEBALLS

Last week it is was time for Nicholas to try out again for the competitive soccer team. He had tried out the last three years and had been selected each time.  In previous years, Nicholas had returned home confident that he was going to make the team. Therefore, we were somewhat concerned when he stated that he was afraid he was not going to make the team after completing the two-day tryout this time. Nonetheless, I told Nicholas that all one can do is try one's best effort and hope for that things work out 

Early the next day, I received an email stating that Nicholas had not been selected for the team. I was heartbroken for the little guy and spent much of the day trying to find a way to tell him. Finally, I decided to talk to him while we were lying in bed about to start reading our books. I first said that I had heard back from the coach. Nicholas immediately came to life and asked what the email said. I told him that he was not selected, to which he responded, “Are you serious?”

It took a few seconds to sink in, but he was soon in tears. He cried in a way that I have not seen since he was a baby – inconsolably. I told him that I was so sorry but that I was proud of him for having the courage to stick his neck on the line and try out when so many of his current teammates had decided to play it safe and not try out again. I told him that I, too, had been in the same situation and was cut during basketball tryouts three years in a row in middle school.

At this point, I paused and asked Nicholas how he felt and what specifically made him so upset. He said that soccer was a huge part of his identity. He said that so many of his friends from school were competitive soccer players who surely were selected during their tryouts. He said he felt like he was able to do the same drills as the other kids during the tryout and that he never got a chance to show his skills during the scrimmages because he never got the ball. Still sobbing, he wondered aloud whether this verdict would mark him for life and meant that his soccer-playing days were over.

I reminded Nicholas that I knew no one who loved the game of soccer more than him – not just playing the game but also studying its players, its teams, and its history. I told him that his love and knowledge of the game had very little to do with being on a competitive team, and I told him that his playing days were far from over. As I held him, he continued to sob. Eventually though, he calmed down and said that he wanted to dedicate himself to improving and trying out again.

I told him that we would look into recreational soccer teams in the neighborhood in the meantime and still play futsal with his friends from Arbor. I even invited him to play pick up soccer with my friends the next day. Finally, I told Nicholas that there are two ways to look at a life event like this. One approach is to feel sorry for one’s self. Another approach is to realize that when one door closes, another door opens. I told him that there were so many additional passions he might now pursue – art, basketball, track and field, frisbee, swimming – none of which have been possible with the year-round schedule of competitive soccer. Nicholas acknowledged these new possibilities and seemed genuinely excited at the prospect of cultivating a new interest.

The next day we did go to the pitch to play pick up soccer. There were several instances when I noticed that Nicholas was being passive and not fully immersed in the game. I gave him the feedback in real-time, which prompted him to play harder and be more engaged. He scored a wonderful goal from the end line from an impossible angle that all the players marveled at. In fact when we were leaving, one of the men asked me Nicholas’ name. I told him, and he said, “Nicholas, that was a great shot. Keep it up!” This brought a huge smile on Nicholas' face.

As we walked home, I put my arm around Nicholas. I realized that I could not solve Nicholas’ setback this time and secure him a place on the team as much as I would have liked to. I still feel absolutely gutted for him. However, as the days have passed, Nicholas has not mentioned his disappointment again. He seems to have realized that there are many more important things to concern himself with, that he is still special, and that the future is still very bright. 

I do not know where Nicholas gets his strength and his resilience – though no doubt Arbor has played a huge role. However, I take great solace in knowing that Nicholas will be able to summon the fortitude to bounce back when life throws its next curve ball at him. As a parent, I cannot wish for more than that for my son.

BEAUTIFUL TEAM

I unwittingly discovered tonight that my futsal team won the weekend Coed League Championship. I was not expecting this title because we had lost two of our eight games this season. That is not to say that we play badly, but we were tied with the top team going into the final game, and the other team had the advantage through goal differential. 

Despite thinking that the league was lost, we went out and put on a show in our last game. We pinged the ball around the pitch and played aggressive defense. The other team was forced into errors that we converted into several goals in succession. At halftime, we led 7-1, and the game ended 9-4.

It was quite a different night from two weeks prior when we played the team that were the league leaders going into the final match. That team played us with force and physicality that I have never witnessed in futsal-a game that is supposed to be non-contact. We were crushed 7-0 that night, mainly because we had been intimidated into making mistakes. We repeatedly gave up the ball out of fear of being kicked if we held on to it for too long. 

We got our revenge, however, the following week in a rematch with our tormenters in the penultimate game of the season. This time, we refused to bend and redoubled our efforts to attack as a unit and move the ball quickly-so quickly that by the time they came to kick us, the ball had already been passed. We triumphed 4-3 in one of the best games our team has ever played. Even Nicholas was impressed. After that game, he said, "Dad, you were really impressive, and that other team was so rough. I do not know how you did it." He was still buzzing about our win the next day and the day after. I was, too, to be honest!

If there is any downside to playing on my team, it is that one gets spoiled. Every person on the team plays his/her heart out and deeply cares about their teammates. It is unlike any other group with which I have ever played, which makes it hard to play with different folks in pick-up games or the like. 

My team always rises or falls as one, but this season we just rose. Here 's to my team-Arse-and-all-a play on words for the ever-undeachieving English side Arsenal, and here's to another title!

FAIRY TALE ENDING

The Premier League has been called the most difficult league in the world. In recent years, the only teams to have prevailed in this league were from Manchester or London. However, something strange happened on the way to the title this year. Leicester City are your 2016 English Premier League Champions!

To say that Leicester's story is a fairy tale would be the understatement of the year. In fact, Leicester was in dead last much of last season and only avoided relegation (demotion to a lower league) on the last day of last season. It was no wonder then that the odds makers gave Leicester a 5000:1 chance of winning the Premier League. But the odds makers did not take into account what a new manager could do with an able-bodied team whom many other clubs had treated as cast-offs.

That manager-Claudio Ranieri-had been a journeyman, managing for almost thirty years without ever winning a domestic title. However, he unified his team and helped them to realize that they could beat any side if they just believed in themselves and worked together. Worked, they did, outrunning, outthinking, and outplaying the best teams in England. So it was quite fitting that Leicester would clinch the title with two games left in the season. That meant that they could celebrate with their fans on the penultimate game of the season-their last home game versus Everton.

Fittingly, the crowd was celebratory. Andrea Bocelli, the great Italian singer was in attendance to serenade Ranieri and the Leicester faithful with "Nessun Dorma" and "Time to Say Goodbye." Bocelli did a riff on the latter and sang, "Time to Win Again." The Foxes, as Leicester are known, obliged and ran Everton into the ground.

There was free beer and pizza for the fans, and it was a day that few who were present will ever forget.

Leicester may never win the Premier League title again, but that does not matter. For one magical season, they were head and shoulders above every team in the toughest league in the world. This story is one for the ages, and one almost needs to be pinched to remind one's self that it actually happened.

Here's to Leicester! Thanks for a season we shall not soon forget-truly one straight out of the children's books but that will go down in the history books!

WE'RE DEAD YET

Tonight Barca were eliminated in the quarterfinals of the Champions League by Atletico Madrid for the second time in three years. One would think that Atletico and Barca's number, but one would be wrong. In fact, Barca had beaten Atletico seven times in a row under the current Barca coach Luis Enrique, including a 2-1 victory in the first leg of this Champions League tie last week.

However, the Catalans were impotent tonight and looked like a shell of their former selves - a team that had not lost a game in 39 straight matches until 2 weeks ago. Indeed, since that streak was ended by Real Madrid, Barca have now lost three matches.

If there is a turning point in this season for Barca, one must look back to that loss to Real Madrid. The game was called "meaningless" because win or lose Barca would still have a large lead in the league standings. Barca went up in the second half in that match but could not see the game out. They conceded to uncharacteristic goals due to defensive lapses and intensity lapses. Since then, their spirits have looked very shaky, and their focus seems to have gone missing.

Tonight, the best team one, and it pains me to say that that team was not Barca. Are we witnessing an end of an era? It sure feels like it when players of Barca's quality seem incapable of mounting a comeback that in any other year would have seemed inevitable. The legs looked heavy. The faces were drawn. The confidence was shattered.

However, rather than lamenting this team's passing, let us also thank them for the beautiful soccer they have played these past six years. There have been so many amazing moments of quality from this team during that period - more than most clubs experience in their entire history. It has not only been what Barca has won, but how they have won it - with style, with attacking flair, with precision. The absence of all those attributes tonight sits in contrast to the glorious moments of the past six years.

So tonight, let us raise a glass to these men, even as we shed a few tears into that glass once we bring it down to take a bitter sip. The Champions League is gone, and we may give up the League and Cup in the weeks to come. No matter what, I love this team like it is a member of my family. Thank you Barca for the moments and memories that I will always treasure. Few things in life have brought me as much joy, and all great things must come to end at some point. If we are at that point, we will look back fondly, and I can confidently say we will NEVER see a team like this again.

Visca Barca!

PRODIGIOUS

How others view one's children is often quite surprising. Most recently, I experienced this when trying to navigate Cate's sports activities for the Spring season.

Last year, Cate played on a boys' baseball team with one of her friends from school. She had a great time, and the coaching was quite good, too. Therefore, we signed her up for baseball again, and she was placed on the same team. The plan was for Cate to also continue her futsal soccer practices throughout the Spring with her competitive team. However, this week we heard that the baseball practices would take place at the exact same time as the futsal practices.

Kathleen contacted the baseball coach and let him know that we probably would not be able to play on the baseball team because of the conflict. The coach quickly replied that he did not want to lose Cate from the team. He said she was a superstar and that he was willing to reschedule the practice time so that Cate could make it. Needless to say, we were taken aback. We thanked him and decided to move forward with both sports. 

We knew we had a Messi on our hands, but who knew we also had a Derek Jeter?! Here's to throwing heat in addition to scoring goals!

BOYHOOD

Today, we went in to Arbor for the "Brain Box" Celebration in Nicholas' classroom. This was an opportunity to see the kids' latest project studying the human brain and contemplating their place in the world. I was truly amazed by the work of each and every child.

For the main project, each child created a box with pictures of him/her in various profile poses for the sides and top of the box. They also diagrammed the brain using the sides of the box and listed the functions of the various brain parts.

Inside the box, they wrote several pieces about various topics. One of the pieces focused on a memorable day of school. Nicholas wrote about his first day of school-a day I remember quite well. He wrote that he was overwhelmed by all of the grown-ups and the loud sounds in the classroom. He also told the story of how his teacher called on him when he looked quite upset that first day. It turns out that Nicholas had counted 21 children in his classroom. This got him quite agitated, and he told his teacher, "My daddy told me there were only supposed to be 20 kids in this class, but I count 21!" It turns out the director of admissions at Arbor was in the classroom at the time. To say that she takes her job seriously would be the understatement of the year. Upon hearing this, she could only smile, shake her head, and make her way to the exit. What a memory on this kid!

Nicholas was also assigned the task of writing a letter addressed to someone whom he admired. I joked with him that he shouldn't have written about me. He quickly replied, "Don't worry dad, I wrote mine to Cate!" 

In his letter, Nicholas wrote about how lucky he was to have Cate as his sister and how she was always so encouraging of him. He specifically cited an example of when he was playing a soccer game and his team was losing. Despite his team's poor performance, Nicholas said he could hear Cate loudly rooting for him on the sidelines the whole time. When he later scored a goal, it was Cate's cheers that he heard first. In proper Arbor tradition, Nicholas also placed a copy of the letter in the mail to Cate. I cannot wait to see her face when she receives it.

Finally, the parents were assigned a task during "Brain Box Day," too. We were charged with writing our child a letter-a letter that would remain unread by the child until the second to last day of eighth grade prior to graduation. 

Many thoughts went through my head as I thought about what to write. First, I thought about how my childhood was virtually free of the many joyous moments I could recall from Nicholas' childhood. I also thought about how that experience colors my own perspective to this day. 

Nicholas, on the other hand, seems to find joy in nearly everything he does, and he is not one to get down. Moreover, he is one of the nicest people whom I have ever met. I wrote those things to him, and I also stole a line from the writer Paul Kalanithi when I told Nicholas that he should remember-especially at life's low points-that he brought me greater joy than anyone else in my life and that that was an immense thing. I told him that I was proud of the boy he had been, the young man he had become, and the man I know he will grow up to be. Tears were shed as I finished up. This was not only because I more fully appreciated just how much my 10 year-old had changed over the course of the last 6 years at Arbor. I also shed tears because I realized that my time with Nicholas under my roof was finite. However, until that day, I will enjoy every minute of this young man-my son, my best friend.

PLAY LIKE A GIRL

Cate has been playing on an Under 9 (year old) "U9" Competitive team at a local futsal facility. Futsal is a five a side game played on a smaller court than a regular soccer pitch using a heavier ball. The focus of the game is ball handling and foot skills rather than speed and power.

This weekend, Rose City hosted its first competitive tournament, and Cate's team was entered in the U9 Division. The other three teams were boys teams because there was not sufficient interest from any of the girl's teams nearby, and all of us felt like our girls would be up to the challenge.

The tournament got off to a rough start as Cate's team lost 7-1 to another team from Rose City. The girls played meekly and seemed to be intimidated by the boys on the other team who were quite aggressive. However, Cate's team stormed back to win the next two game. These wins secured them a place in the Final, where a rematch with the first team they had played awaited.

In the Final, we scored first, and our girls were bossing the game. However, the other team put two goals past Cate who was playing goalie before the end of the first half. The parents of Cate's team were doing our best to motivate the girls with lots of cheering, and I must confess a little too much coaching from the stands-myself included. In the second half, our girls took control and shut the other team down. The final score was 6-3, and our girls were victors.

Afterwards, there was an awards ceremony complete with medals and a log slice trophy a la the Timbers. We cheered our girls on, and it was amazing to see the pride and the joy on their faces.

I could not be more proud of these young ladies. They showed the players and families on the other teams what it means to "play like a girl." I hope our players carry this victory with them and realize that they are the many determinants of their success and that no obstacle is insurmountable if one throws one's self into the task! I cannot wait for the next challenge!

LESSONS LEARNED

Our kids are pretty well-behaved for the most part. This is why we were a little surprised to hear that there had been an issue on the bus last week involving Cate.

When asked about it, Cate said that she and her friend were merely being loud. However, a phone call from Cate's teacher described things as a little more complicated that that. Apparently there was some  teasing and then name calling going on. Cate was a victim of the former and then was guilt of the latter.

We asked Cate to tell us the full truth about what happened that night after I got home. She was very reluctant at first and was quite upset to even talk about the matter. Finally, she told us that one of the girls on the bus had been making fun of Cate and Cate's best friend, a boy from her class. The girl teased them for being married and being in love because Cate always sits next to this boy on the bus. Despite Cate's insistence that they were not married and pleas for this girl to stop, the taunting continued. At one point the girl also remarked that there was an ugly truck driving past them out the window. I suppose Cate saw her opening because our little one retorted, "Not as ugly as your face!"

I made a point to explain to Cate that her remark was every bit as hurtful as the girl's teasing and that is was not acceptable. I also explained that I could empathize with Cate and her frustration. We talked about other ways to handle situations like this and how perhaps she and her friend should sit apart from the girl. We also explained that she should involve the bus driver and that we would speak to the girl's mom if anything like this happened again. Cate expressed understanding, and we had a big hug and a lot of tear-drying. 

What I did not say to Cate was that I was a little floored by the directness of her comment to the girl. It was a hell of a comeback for a seven year-old. Succinct, pointed, dagger. I do not condone this type of behavior, but sometimes one needs to fight fire with fire with bullies. Here's hoping there can be some sort of detente. We will add this to the list of childhood lessons learned.

 

WHEN BREATH BECOMES AIR

Every once in a while a book comes along that inspires you and moves you in a way that you forgot was possible. The memoir When Breath Becomes Air written by the late neurosurgeon Dr. Paul Kalanithi is one of those books.

What made the book so compelling was the juxtaposition of this young surgeon-scientist's promising future and the utter unfairness and cruelty of his diagnosis of metastatic, terminal lung cancer at the age of 36. Despite his medical training, there was no preparation for such a fate. However, how the author responded to such a grave situation serves as a wake-up call to us all. Life is until further notice, and despite-or rather because of-life's ephemeral quality, we must immerse ourselves in what gives our life meaning. For the author, it was continuing his training as a surgeon and becoming a father despite his terminal diagnosis.

He chose both these routes not because they were easy. Rather, he chose these routes because they were hard and because life-in his opinion-was not about avoiding painful situations. Instead, painful experiences teach us about what really matters in life.

As a youngish, Indian-American physician-scientist and part-time writer, I was moved by Paul's words and by the intimate self-portrait he painted in When Breath Becomes Air. I could not stop thinking about my own children while reading it, and the heartbreak Paul must have felt when he had to say goodbye to his infant daughter Cady. Paul's death-like many of my patients' deaths-reminds me that what matters in life is the legacy we leave behind through our deeds and actions. None of us knows when his or her last day will be, which means that we are all still works in progress. We can start each day anew and constantly strive to leave the world a little better than we had before.


We can also express our gratitude more openly to the ones we love before it is too late, and appreciate all the joys and wonders that life brings. Nothing I can write here captures Paul's spirit more than the final passage of the book he wrote to young Cady:

"When you come to one of the many moments in life when you must give an account of yourself, provide a ledger of what you have been, and done, and meant to the world, do not, I pray, discount that you filled a dying man’s days with a sated joy, a joy unknown to me in all my prior years, a joy that does not hunger for more and more, but rests, satisfied. In this time, right now, that is an enormous thing."

Buy this book now, and by all means pay full price! It will be the best money you ever spend. Thank you for your example Paul, and may you rest in peace.

THE LITTLE MAGICIAN

We normally equate magicians with trickery or artifice. However, every once in a while someone comes around who makes us believe that everything he does is truly supernatural. Lionel Messi is that kind of magician, and today he picked up his record-setting fifth Ballon d'Or trophy for being the best player in world football.

I have appreciated Messi's greatness for five years now since I first watched a Barcelona match on TV. Messi seemed to float around the pitch and to effortlessly do things that no other players was doing. Yes, there were goals galore, but it was the way he scored rather than the sheer volume of his goals that was awe-inspiring. Since that time, and even before I became an admirer, Messi has been thrilling fans worldwide, and 2015 was no exception.

To appreciate what Messi has achieved this year requires a formal accounting. First, he scored 52 goals in 61 games-one goal every 101 minutes and the second most in European football. Some of these goals were astounding, including this goal in the 2015 Copa del Rey Final that was one of three finalists for the goal of the year. Importantly, Messi scored many other goals that really mattered, including this brilliant strike in the Champions League semifinal that literally left one of the top defenders in the world on his backside and that secured Barca a spot in the Final.

Further, Messi is not just a goal scorer. He also provided 26 assists last year-the most in Europe. This is an amazing feat for a midfielder, never mind a forward like Messi, and speaks volumes about Messi's unselfishness and team play.

Finally, one must also consider what Messi helped his teams achieve this year-both Barca and the Argentine national team. Both of these teams were in every single final of every single competition available to them. Messi led Barca to five out of six possible trophies, a feat only surpassed once by Messi's 2009 Barca team. These trophies include: Spanish La Liga League title, Spanish Copa del Rey title, UEFA Champions League title, UEFA Super Cup title, FIFA Club World Cup title. Messi also led Argentina to the Copa America Final, where he executed his penalty in the shootout while his teammates badly faltered and cost them the title. Five trophies in a lifetime would be a feat, but to play an indispensable role in securing all five in a season is unheard of.

More than all of the silverware and plaudits, though, Messi exudes class and joy when he is on the field. I truly believe him when he said today, "I don't think about whether I am the best. I just enjoy the day-to-day and after all that if I am the best or not-it doesn't change much." His humility in the face of his achievements is truly unheard of, and that is another reason I love him.

Truly, at this point, Messi has nothing more to prove. He knows he will never win over some of his critics who constantly remind him of his empty World Cup cabinet. However, I hope that some of them can set aside their personal grudges with this man and simply sit back and enjoy the show he put on in 2015 and continues to put on in 2016 (5 goals and 2 assists in 3 games so far). I know I will enjoy this little magician's act for as long as he on stage.

Here's to Leo!

THE MEURSAULT INVESTIGATION

One of the most influential books of my young adulthood was Albert Camus' The Stranger. I have read the book over twenty times and even read the original French version on one occasion. The book is told from the perspective of a pied noir, or French Algerian colonist, named Meursault and depicts his mostly impersonal existence. It is only after Meursault kills an unnamed Arab for no apparent good reason and is sentenced to death that he comes to realize that he is alive and that our lives have consequences. Just before death, Meursault realizes that many our hopes and dreams are looked upon indifferently by the Universe (i.e God), and that we have only one life to live.

The Stranger is spartan in its writing, but it leaves the reader with many questions about his/her place in this world. Indeed, many consider it the best existentialist novel ever written, and this book is credited for the Nobel Committee's decision to award Camus the Nobel Prize for Literature in 1957.

It is not uncommon for great works of literary fiction to be accompanied by controversy. Mostly, these controversies center around the author rather than the content of a decades-old book. However, every now and then a work comes along that challenges the neat order of a great work of fiction like The Stranger.  Kamel Daoud's The Meursault Investigation is exactly that type of book.

Rather than serving as a rebuttal, The Meursault Investigation is more of a retelling of The Stranger. In Daoud's book the narrator is Harun (Aaron) the brother of the Arab killed in The Stranger. That dead man had a name-Musa(Moses), and Daoud seeks to explain how Musa's death had implications far beyond Meursault's prison sentence and ultimate execution. Harun's mother's life and his own are turned upside down by the killing, and they leave Algiers for Oran. Harun comes of age after the murder, and his mother's indifference and inability to cope with Musa's death severely impacts her ability to parent and care for her son.

In the new book, Harun tells the story of his life, Musa's life, and his mom's life to a stranger in a restaurant/bar. We see the toll that the French colonialist took on Algerian life as exemplified by Musa's senseless killing. Despite the connection to The Stranger, the book is told more in the style of Camus' The Fall-confessional but also seeking to engender empathy and complicity from the reader.

I was expecting this book to be an indictment of Camus and the West and Harun to one become a radical. However, the true tragedy of this novel is that after surviving the French occupation and gaining independence, Algerians like Harun must now cope with an even worse threat-Fundamentalist Muslims who do not agree with Harun's consumption of alcohol or religious and political moderation.  The narrator clearly laments what has become of his life and his country.

It is in this same environment that the author-a journalist in Oran-lives today. According to a wonderful New York Times review of his book, Daoud was sanctioned with a fatwah by a Muslim cleric after this book's publication, but Daoud soldiers on.  He apparently lives by the words of another Algerian writer Tahar Djaout who faced a similar sanction and who was ultimately murdered in the 1990s. Djaout wrote, "If you speak, you die. If you don't speak, you die. So, speak and die." I thank Daoud for speaking because his words have so much meaning and have helped me to see The Stranger in a much clearer and empathic light.

INDIGNANCE

This week President Obama came out swinging about the tragedy of gun violence in America. First, he gave a moving address from the White House, in which he was surrounded by victims of gun violence. In that speech, the President talked about the tragic, senseless loss of so many Americans to gun violence. He was angry, and he was also visibly emotional-even moved to tears at times.

He followed this up with an Op-Ed in the New York Times today-something that has rarely been done by a sitting American president. In that piece, the President called for common sense measures to reduce gun violence. He acknowledged that these measures would not stop all gun violence. However, he made it clear that they would be successful if they only saved one life.

I could not agree with him more, especially when I look at Nicholas and Cate. Cate is a first grader, the same age as the children who were gunned down in Sandy Hook Elementary in Newtown, Connecticut. I would be destroyed if I lost her this way. Wouldn't any politician-Democrat or Republican-feel shame if their loved one was gunned down because they failed to enact common-sense legislation? And yet, they do not act. This is because they view gun violence as someone else problem and because there is no political pressure for them to vote with their conscience rather with the National Rifle Association.

I hope that our leaders one day see the light. Perhaps it will take more Newtowns, San Bernadinos, or Rosebergs where these politician's families' lives are lost. At the current rate, gun violence will  certainly make its way to a community near them and us all. Oh, the indignity of this country.

THE MARE

Books can transport you to new places, but the best books can transform your point of view. In that sense, The Mare by Mary Gaitskill is a transformative book. This is not because the book uses some new literary device. Rather, The Mare is powerful because it forces you to step out of your comfort zone and to appreciate the points of view of characters who are seemingly so different from yourself.

The story begins with a young Dominican girl named Velveteen who lives in New York City. Velveteen has been matched up with a white family in rural New York through the Fresh Air Fund. The goal of that organization is to give inner city kids experiences away from home in nature. Ginger and Paul are the hosts, and they quickly take to Velveteen despite their very different backgrounds from hers Velveteen, in turn, is drawn to them and all the experiences that they have to offer, including horse back riding.

It turns out that Velveteen is quite a natural on a horse and becomes particularly attracted to a mare at a nearby stable nicknamed Fugly Girl. This mare suffered greatly at the hands of her previous owners, and to say that Fugly Girl is troubled is an understatement. Ginger, too, has a rocky past, and the book reveals that Velveteen's life has also been quite challenging. While the mare of the book seemingly refers to Fugly Girl, it soon becomes clear that all of these female characters have much in common. Each female is a mare in her own right.

We appreciate the similarities of these characters because the book is told in chapters of one to three pages-each told from the perspective of one of the characters, namely Ginger, Velveteen, Velveteen's mother, or Paul. Without these first person perspectives, it would be very easy to misunderstand the motivations of these characters. However, Gaitskill's tale puts us squarely in each person's shoes. This helps the reader to understand many of their fateful and seemingly self-destructive actions, and I am not sure I have ever read a more empathic book.

I will not give away the ending, but suffice it to say that I had a much deeper appreciation and understanding of all the characters in this book at the end. This was despite the fact that they were worlds away from me in location and experience.  We should be so lucky to have more experiences like reading The Mare-a book that truly makes this world seem a little smaller and that makes us all feel a little more connected.

COMING BACK HOME

This week we visited Barcelona for winter vacation. This was my fourth trip there in four years and the family's third trip there in the past three years. There are many reasons we keep coming back. These include the beautiful weather, scenery, football, and people. The sum of these parts create a whole and experiencing Barcelona is not so much about things, places, or people. It is a feeling.

Much of our life is spent going through the motions and not truly appreciating life's wonders. That way of being is impossible in Barcelona for me. Perhaps it is because of the sites, the friendly and beautiful populace, or even the distinctive clean, sweet smell of the city. What I do know is that this city had me at hello when I first visited in 1998 at the end of medical school, and it keeps drawing me back. I am sure there will be another trip back in the near future.

Barcelona, I cannot quit you! Fins aviat (See you later)!

RESOLVE

Each year at this time of year people around the world resolve to change their lives for the better. However, most resolutions fail. There are many explanations for this, but one important factor is that if our resolutions were easy we would already be doing them.

I do not have a complicated resolution for 2016. Rather, my vow is: Be more kind and show more empathy. These may sound like simple ideas, but they are actually quite difficult in our me-centric world.  However, despite the difficulty of living life this way, it is essential. That is the only way to make the world a little less dark. Imagine if everyone behaved this way. We would have no ISIS. We would have no refugees. We would have no mass killings-or at least less of them.

Our lives just like this world are works in progress. This means that each day we begin anew and can always try to succeed where we may have failed. Here’s to starting off 2016 on the right foot and to being mindful that there is a world outside our own full of people with their own hopes, aspirations, and baggage just like us.

Happy New Year!