Thursday, February 25, 2016

BOYHOOD


Today, we went in to Arbor for the "Brain Box" Celebration in Nicholas' classroom. This was an opportunity to see the kids' latest project studying the human brain and contemplating their place in the world. I was truly amazed by the work of each and every child.

For the main project, each child created a box with pictures of him/her in various profile poses for the sides and top of the box. They also diagrammed the brain using the sides of the box and listed the functions of the various brain parts.

Inside the box, they wrote several pieces about various topics. One of the pieces focused on a memorable day of school. Nicholas wrote about his first day of school-a day I remember quite well. He wrote that he was overwhelmed by all of the grown-ups and the loud sounds in the classroom. He also told the story of how his teacher called on him when he looked quite upset that first day. It turns out that Nicholas had counted 21 children in his classroom. This got him quite agitated, and he told his teacher, "My daddy told me there were only supposed to be 20 kids in this class, but I count 21!" It turns out the director of admissions at Arbor was in the classroom at the time. To say that she takes her job seriously would be the understatement of the year. Upon hearing this, she could only smile, shake her head, and make her way to the exit. What a memory on this kid!

Nicholas was also assigned the task of writing a letter addressed to someone whom he admired. I joked with him that he shouldn't have written about me. He quickly replied, "Don't worry dad, I wrote mine to Cate!" 

In his letter, Nicholas wrote about how lucky he was to have Cate as his sister and how she was always so encouraging of him. He specifically cited an example of when he was playing a soccer game and his team was losing. Despite his team's poor performance, Nicholas said he could hear Cate loudly rooting for him on the sidelines the whole time. When he later scored a goal, it was Cate's cheers that he heard first. In proper Arbor tradition, Nicholas also placed a copy of the letter in the mail to Cate. I cannot wait to see her face when she receives it.

Finally, the parents were assigned a task during "Brain Box Day," too. We were charged with writing our child a letter-a letter that would remain unread by the child until the second to last day of eighth grade prior to graduation. 

Many thoughts went through my head as I thought about what to write. First, I thought about how my childhood was virtually free of the many joyous moments I could recall from Nicholas' childhood. I also thought about how that experience colors my own perspective to this day. 

Nicholas, on the other hand, seems to find joy in nearly everything he does, and he is not one to get down. Moreover, he is one of the nicest people whom I have ever met. I wrote those things to him, and I also stole a line from the writer Paul Kalanithi when I told Nicholas that he should remember-especially at life's low points-that he brought me greater joy than anyone else in my life and that that was an immense thing. I told him that I was proud of the boy he had been, the young man he had become, and the man I know he will grow up to be. Tears were shed as I finished up. This was not only because I more fully appreciated just how much my 10 year-old had changed over the course of the last 6 years at Arbor. I also shed tears because I realized that my time with Nicholas under my roof was finite. However, until that day, I will enjoy every minute of this young man-my son, my best friend.

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