WHEN BREATH BECOMES AIR

Every once in a while a book comes along that inspires you and moves you in a way that you forgot was possible. The memoir When Breath Becomes Air written by the late neurosurgeon Dr. Paul Kalanithi is one of those books.

What made the book so compelling was the juxtaposition of this young surgeon-scientist's promising future and the utter unfairness and cruelty of his diagnosis of metastatic, terminal lung cancer at the age of 36. Despite his medical training, there was no preparation for such a fate. However, how the author responded to such a grave situation serves as a wake-up call to us all. Life is until further notice, and despite-or rather because of-life's ephemeral quality, we must immerse ourselves in what gives our life meaning. For the author, it was continuing his training as a surgeon and becoming a father despite his terminal diagnosis.

He chose both these routes not because they were easy. Rather, he chose these routes because they were hard and because life-in his opinion-was not about avoiding painful situations. Instead, painful experiences teach us about what really matters in life.

As a youngish, Indian-American physician-scientist and part-time writer, I was moved by Paul's words and by the intimate self-portrait he painted in When Breath Becomes Air. I could not stop thinking about my own children while reading it, and the heartbreak Paul must have felt when he had to say goodbye to his infant daughter Cady. Paul's death-like many of my patients' deaths-reminds me that what matters in life is the legacy we leave behind through our deeds and actions. None of us knows when his or her last day will be, which means that we are all still works in progress. We can start each day anew and constantly strive to leave the world a little better than we had before.


We can also express our gratitude more openly to the ones we love before it is too late, and appreciate all the joys and wonders that life brings. Nothing I can write here captures Paul's spirit more than the final passage of the book he wrote to young Cady:

"When you come to one of the many moments in life when you must give an account of yourself, provide a ledger of what you have been, and done, and meant to the world, do not, I pray, discount that you filled a dying man’s days with a sated joy, a joy unknown to me in all my prior years, a joy that does not hunger for more and more, but rests, satisfied. In this time, right now, that is an enormous thing."

Buy this book now, and by all means pay full price! It will be the best money you ever spend. Thank you for your example Paul, and may you rest in peace.