Thursday, December 31, 2020

WHAT WE LOST AND WHAT WE GAINED IN 2020

2020 was an unimaginably difficult year for so many reasons. The year was shaping up to be a challenging one even before COVID because we had just moved to Ann Arbor in the summer of 2019 and were still quite unsettled. Any sense of disorientation was magnified several orders when the COVID pandemic began to rage in March, 2020.

It might be easier to list the ways in which COVID has not affected our lives, rather than the way it has. Our clinics shifted to virtual using the "Lombardy Model" based on the strategy used in Lombardy, Italy, one of the regions hit hardest early on. In Italy, they staggered the workforce in order to avoid exposing their entire medical teams at once - kind of like sending in different battalions of troops to take enemy fire at the front in shifts. Our clinic moved to that model, and for several weeks Kathleen and I had no in-person outpatient visits. 

The kids school was shut down as they made the switch to virtual or "zoom" school. Greenhills was still able to provide a decent learning experience for Nicholas. However, Cate's experience in Ann Arbor Public was definitely affected, especially since her regular teacher went out on maternity leave.

Much of our year has spent in front of screens and apart from those we love. Movies, concerts, and so much of the fun we took for granted shifted to online.

Restaurants - those that were not shuttered - shifted to carryout or delivery, and I cannot recall the last time I ate out in person.

Our democracy and institutions decayed under Trump and his collaborators in the Republican Party, and he somehow survived impeachment despite damning evidence. Fortunately, the voters' voices were heard on November 3, 2020, election day, also known as one of the happiest days of my life. Somehow, various functionaries did not cave to his demands as of this writing, and Joe Biden is set to become the 45th President in three weeks' time.

The saddest week of my family's life took place in September, 2020 when my teenage niece Jasmine ended her life. Words cannot convey the grief and pain of that week and the weeks that have followed. I came to realize that the only way through calamities such as this is through the love and empathy of others. So many people I know or my family knows were there for us in so many ways. I will never forget their kindness, and I will try to never take my family and children for granted. 

Going down to San Antonio during COVID to support Joselyn was the hardest thing I have ever done, but it is one of the things in my life that I am so glad to have done. Whatever small degree of comfort I may have provided to her and my family was far outweighed by the love I felt from them. Fortunately, I was able to see my mom, brother, and my dad - whom I had not seen in almost two years, as well.

Finally, we were plagued by power failures in 2019 in Ann Arbor. Therefore, we broke down and bought a generator for our house in 2020. However, fittingly for 2020 and the Michigan power grid, we experienced a power outage on our last night in Glen Arbor in our rental home for approximately five hours. 2020, man!

These are many of the things we lost, but we also found many things this past year. I worked on being a better husband and dad. Though, I still have a long way to go, I am encouraged that my family has stuck together and been a source of strength for each other.

Three of our federal grants were funded, and we added a new person to our lab. I made new friends at work and took on new leadership roles. 

My friend Kate introduced me to Marilynne Robinson and her Gilead series, which I have loved. My friend Pam introduced me to Mary Oliver, and I have begun to devour all of her poems. 

I think this Mary Oliver poem captures the essence of this tragedy-filled year. I can only hope that we come out of this year stronger and that we never take for granted our freedom, our health, and those we love. What else is more important in life?

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