THE LAST WHITE MAN

I recently finished Mohsin Hamid's, "The Last White Man." The novel takes places in an undisclosed location, where the main character, a white man, wakes up one day brown. At first, he cannot believe it, but soon he comes to accept that he is a member of this second class group of citizens.

Soon, much of the country undergoes the same conversion. Hysteria about being overtaken and having their society transformed against their will becomes a common sentiment. In the end, the entire country comes to terms with the fact that it has been irrevocably changed. While some characters have greater empathy for the natrual born browned skin among them, many people are horrified by what has become of them.

I could not help but think about the west and its response to immigration and how our societies have become more multi-cultural or mixed. My children and my marriage are emblematic of this change. 

I hope that we can come to accept each other for who we are without regard to color one day. I won't hold my breath.

STATE CHAMPIONS

This past weekend, the Michigan Tigers U15 Elite Girls Team won the Michigan State Youth Soccer Association State Cup, the first time a Michigan Tigers girls' team to do so.

It was a tight affair against our regional rivals, the Legends. After regulation it was 0-0, and three of our players had already received yellow cards in a very physical game. The referee - needless to say - was not great.

In extra time, we had several chances, but we did not break through. That meant penalties...

Cate was the first to take a penalty, and she cooly slotted to the keeper's left. Their player skied their penalty. We missed the next one, but then our keeper made a save. We nailed our next one, and Legends again missed theirs. It is noteworthy that Legends' semifinal match - that we watched - also ended in a shootout, and our goalie took notes on how their players took their penalties. She had notes written on her water bottle during our penalty shootout, and these notes turned out to be huge.

When our next player stepped up to take her penalty, we all knew that a successful kick would end it. She slotted her penalty in clinically, and players and families alike rushed the field.

What a great achievement. On this day, Tigers were legends!

MEET ME IN ST. LOUIS

Last week, Cate and I traveled to St. Louis for her soccer. The last time I was there was over 25 years ago when I visited a former high school friend who was then a student in the WashU Business School.

Friday night, we explored an area near WashU Medical Center called the Central West End. My friend Asim, who is a St. Louis native, had recommended a local pizza spot called Pi, which we decided to check out. As you can tell from the pics below, it was yummy!

Saturday morning, I drove back into town from the suburb we were staying in for a run in Forest Park, one of the largest and most public public parks in the country. It was beautiful!

Later that day, we had breakfast with Asim, whom I had not seen in over three years. It was wonderful catching up and reminiscing about old times. Hard to believe we have known each other for 28
years! 

After that, there were two games - both of which Cate's team won. In the second, Cate scored two goals, including a peach of a penalty! 

St Louis, we'll be back!

EMERALD CLUB

In the past few years, I have become a member of a number of frequent traveler clubs. There are several reasons I joined. First, these clubs provide their members with special perks like early boarding on airlines or skipping the counter at car rentals. Second, it is also possible to rack up miles or days for free flights/rentals.

Cate more than anyone loves these perks, and she always wants to hit up the Delta Sky Club when we travel together!

One week ago we visited St. Louis for her soccer. We landed and headed to the rental car area. At National, our preferred vendor, they have the Emerald aisle, where one can pick out any midsize car. We found a nice SUV that I was pretty sure was located in the Emerald aisle (as opposed to the aisle across the way), and so we hopped in.

When we stopped at the exit on our way out, the gentleman reviewed my license and rental agreement. Just as we were about to leave, he pointed out that the Lincoln SUV we were in was actually from the Executive aisle and not the Emerald aisle. I apologized, but he waved us on. Membership, I suppose, has its privileges!

LAST FIRST DAY

Today was the last first day of school for Nicholas under our roof. The timing coincided with a visit this past weekend from two of my dear friends from Austin who were dropping off their kids at U-M for college. Needless to say, it was an emotional weekend for my friends who had to say goodbye to their kids and see them stretch their wings without them.

I still have one more year with Nicholas, but I was deeply moved by how my friends navigated the weekend and by all the emotions that overcame them. It gave me a preview of what I will probably go through one year from now when Nicholas leaves home.

This morning, Nicholas got up as usual, ate his breakfast, and got dressed for school. However, today brought back memories of Cate's first day of fifth grade when we first moved to Ann Arbor. She refused to let us take her to school, saying that she wanted to ride her bike to her elementary school about 1.5 miles away on her own. I still remember that brave young soul exerting herself and riding away as I stood in the driveway. 

This first day was different from other years for another reason - Nicholas now drives and no longer needs a ride to school. Before they left, like other years, they let me take a photo of them on their first day.

Then, Nicholas and Cate loaded themselves into the Highlander.

They backed away out of the driveway and headed down Heather Way on their own. Again, I stood stunned in the driveway, taking it all in.

I thought about how much they have grown and how far they have come. We raise our children to be able to handle all kinds of situations and to become independent and capable of finding their way in this world. Moments like today and this past weekend reveal the bittersweet nature of accomplishing that mission. 

I now have a better understanding of what it truly means to be a parent. To sacrifice one's self for a child is the easy part; it is letting go that is the real work and every bit as important as the sacrifices.

I was reminded today of the poem "What is Supposed to Happen" by Naomi Shihab Nye, one of my favorite poets:

When you were small,

we watched you sleeping,

waves of breath

filling your chest.

Sometimes we hid behind

the wall of baby, soft cradle

of baby needs.

I loved carrying you between

my own body and the world.

Now you are sharpening pencils,

entering the forest of

lunch boxes, little desks.

People I never saw before

call out your name

and you wave.

This loss I feel,

this shrinking,

as your field of roses

grows and grows….

Now I understand history.

Now I understand my mother’s ancient eyes.

Her words and the emotions they evoke tell me that she surely is a parent. I think my friends and I, too, now share those ancient eyes.

GETTING TO HOME IN PORTLAND

Today, Nicholas and I drove to Portland - Portland, Michigan - for him to take the SAT again.

Portland is 1.5 hours away, so we had to get up at 5:15AM in order to make it in time. Nicholas slept on the way, and his test was 4 hours, which gave me time to kill and think about a lot of things. 

It was fitting that I was so reflective since we were driving to Portland - the namesake of our old home.

Three years have passed since our move, and so much has changed. We are only now beginning to make friends and some roots, and the kids feel completely settled. Ann Arbor is a lovely place, but there is so much we have yet to see.

I had the very strange sensation when I was walking around Portland that Michigan finally feels like home. There has been so much water under the bridge and over the bridge with the storm of COVID and all its disruption. However, those experiences the past three years have made us stronger at home and at work. 

It is only through adversity and pressure and stress that true, dynamic change happens, and we have all changed in so many ways. However, what we all take from this move and its attendant challenges is strength - strength of character, strength of purpose, and strength of family 

I know that we would all be different people had we not moved - in good ways and in bad. I cannot predict whom we would have become, but I can say that I am grateful to have the life we do and to have such an amazing family to experience the past few years and live through this thing called life.

POWER-AID

Last weekend Cate's team competed in the Powerade Tournament just north of Ann Arbor. Her team has been traveling around the country playing in the National Pro League, so it was nice to have a game closer to home.

The girls were knocked out of of the National Championship in the group stage in their last tournament in Orlando last month, so they were ready to prove themselves. Importantly, the team recently strengthened with three new additions, and their power-aid has been immediately felt!

We won the first game 4-0 against a younger 2009 birth year team, Northville Rush, that won state cup this year. In the second game, we beat Nationals Union 3-1. Our third game, we lit Michigan Burn on fire 3-0. 

That set up the final - a rematch against Northville Rush. This time our quality really shined through, including a dynamic midfielder wearing number 11, our very own Cate! 

The final result was 7-0, and our girls were named champions!

It was great to see the new girls so seamlessly transition to the team. I can't wait to see what all they achieve this year.