LA LA LAND

La La Land has been receiving critical acclaim for the past few months. Last night our family decided to check it out at the aptly-named Hollywood Theatre in our neighborhood.

The movie focuses on two young people trying to make their way in modern day Los Angeles, whose nickname happens to be La La Land. The lovely Emma Stone plays Mia, an actress, and the wonderful Ryan Gosling plays, a jazz musician. After several chance encounters, these two fall in love. Despite that, neither loses sight of what brought his/her to La La Land in the first place - the dream of making it as an artist.

The movie was bittersweet on so many levels. Most of all, the movie was moving because it captured the very human desire to succeed professionally but also to find love. That it difficult to have both is something that this movie captures better than any I have veer watched. Deep down, we often have to choose- does one stay with one's current situation that is familiar and comfortable or does one chase one's dreams not knowing what the outcome might be. I dare so that for many, there is not a harder choice in life. Fortunately, as the movie, demonstrates, things can "work out" no matter what one chooses, and it is clear that we are all the sum of our choices along the way. The existentialists would be proud of La La Land for sure!

Fantastic movie-making for me is ultimately about stories and characters that help you remember that there is more that unites us as human beings than divides us. I will not spoil the movie's ending for you, but suffice it to say that the final 20 minutes of La La Land were among the finest I have ever seen on screen. I felt as though I was in the room with these two and that I had strapped on their skins. It's rare to feel anything close to that in real life, but this movie reminds one just how powerful certain connections can be.

In three words, La La Land is: Sadness. Beauty. Life. Go see for yourself!

STRETCH FORWARD

This week, Nicholas started playing basketball on a rec team at our local community center. His interest in basketball is relatively new. However, like all of his interests, Nicholas has dived right into the game. He already has a fairly encyclopedic knowledge of the game and its star players. Therefore, it has been fun to watch Nicholas also become more interested in playing the game I loved growing up.

During Christmas vacation, we spent quite a bit of time playing at the court by my mom's house, and it was often two (Cate and Nicholas) against one (me). As you can guess, Cate already has mad skills, but Nicholas has also made significant progress in his technique.

At practice this week, we met Nicholas' new rec teammates, and they seems like a great group of kids. Nicholas was one of the more talented of the kids, and I cannot wait to see him play in his first game this weekend. His natural position appears to be a "stretch forward," and it is great to see him out there stretching himself forward!

Life is too short for just one sport, and here's to hoping that Nicholas can grow into both a player and fan of b-ball for years to come.

GRACE

Today marks the end of an era - the end of the Presidency of Barack Obama. In these past eight years, there has been incredible change in the world. However, one thing has remained constant in this country - President Obama's grace and character under extreme duress. Therefore, it was no surprise that President Obama delivered one of the most impassioned yet dignified farewell speeches in American history.

The catastrophe Obama inherited from George W. Bush - two wars and an economy in free fall - is probably only rivaled by the disaster Franklin Roosevelt faced during his Presidency. However, Obama did not complain. Rather, he rolled up his sleeves and got to work to help turn our country around and to putt us on much surer footing.

Because of President Obama, millions more Americans now have health insurance. Auto mileage standards are higher than ever, which may make a lasting effect on improving our environment. Bin Laden is dead. All of these achievements are even more remarkable when one considers the obstruction President Obama faced from the Republican Congress whose stated mission was to oppose the President at all costs. These "leaders" knew that Obama's vision of the country was one of post-partisanship, post-discrimination, post-fill-in-the-blank. If they could just prove that his vision was wrong, they knew that they could defuse his mandate and create a sense of cynicism in the American public. That they succeeded in this mission explains so much about the turn to populism that our country now faces. Let it be said - no, let it be screamed from the mountaintops - that the Republicans will own the havoc that will be wreaked in the next five years. They were enablers, appeasers, and villains.

Rather than merely hold these people in contempt, it is our job to speak up, to protest, to make our voices heard at the ballot box. There is no room for violence despite the fierce urgency of now. My hope is that the greatest movement for resistance will be created in this country and that we will win our country back through our words, deeds, and votes. Join in! The ride will be so much better with you along.

COMMONWEALTH

Sometimes a book comes along that really grabs you with its characters and its story. "Commonwealth" by Ann Patchett is one of those books.

I have loved Ann Patchett's writing ever since I read "Run," but "Commonwealth" is truly her finest. The books tells the story of two families thrown together by the infidelity of the mom of family #1 and the dad of family #2. Along the way, the children experience the fallout of this "shotgun" marriage, and their lives are changed in drastic ways.

At its core, "Commonwealth" is about disruption, disorder, and the messiness that comes with being in a family. Apparently this book was based on Patchett's own experiences, but the books resonates with anyone who has experienced messy, drawn-out family experiences. The adage "one cannot live without family, but one cannot live with family" is certainly an apt description for the book, and I cannot recommend it highly enough.

A BRIGHT SPOT

Earlier this year, the world was introduced to a young Afghan boy named Murtazi Ahamdi, who may well be the world's biggest Lionel Messi fan. His father could not afford a proper kit for Murtazi. Therefore, he made his son a replica Argentina "jersey" out of a blue and white-striped trash bag. The pictures went viral.

Once Messi heard about this story, he sent the boy real Argentina and Barca jerseys. However, that was just the beginning, and today Murtazi got to meet his idol and attend an exhibition match between Barca and the Qatari side Al Ahli in Doha.

As you can tell from the video below, Murtazi had to be pried from Messi, and I am sure it will go down as a day that both Murtazi and Messi will not soon forget.



Here's to one of life's bright spots in a very dark year!

TRAGEDY/TRAVESTY

The elections of 2008 and 2012 were joyous events in my home and the homes of many whom I love. In that sense, the election of 2016 could not be more foreign - truly a tragedy, a travesty.

How did we end up with President-elect Trump? I will leave that to the pundits like David Remnick from the New Yorker to describe. However, one thing is clear. Our democracy "worked." America got the president it desired and deserves, and walls like the one shown on the cover of this week's NewYorker may well start coming up.

As we do a post-mortem on this election, I want you to let a few numbers sink in:

231,556,622 eligible voters in the U.S.
25.5% voted for Trump
25.6% voted for Hillary
46.9% did not vote

Many of those who stayed home were minorities such as African-Americans or millennials. They had the most to lose with a Trump presidency, and yet they were not moved enough to let their voices be heard at the ballot box. Worse still, many of those who did show up voted for a third party candidate-essentially casting a vote for Trump. These "no" votes or wasted votes were enough to flip traditionally blue states like Michigan, Pennsylvania, and Wisconsin to Trump. I will never forgive these irresponsible Americans. Ever.

Moreover, nearly half the country looked the other way and apparently were comfortable with all of Trump's horrible words and deeds. How any woman, person of color, or human being with a conscience could cast a vote for him, I will never understand.

At this time though, we must look forward. Blame will not change the outcome of this election. Our goal must be to preserve the Union and prevent actions, laws, or movements that undermine the America that I know and love-a place built of diversity, tolerance, and hope.

The default position will be to throw up one's arms and give up or allow the fascists to slow erode our civil liberties and values. I will do everything in my power to resist that. How are some ways one can join the resistance, you ask? First, subscribe to a newspaper or magazine such as the New York Times, the Washington Post, or the New Yorker. Volunteer for progressive causes or campaigns so we can try to win back at least one house of Congress in order to provide some check on a Trump presidency. Vote, phone bank, and get involved with local issues and elections.

Most importantly, set a good example for your neighbors, friends, and loved ones and never let intolerance or injustice go unchecked. For if we do, that is the beginning of the end for our country as we have know it. Just ask Russians, Turks, and the British.

I will leave you tonight with the opening segment of last night's episode of Saturday Night Live.
That show did everything in its power this election season to bring to light the horrors of Donald Trump. Last night, the show struck a more somber tone when the actress Kate McKinnonn who played Hillary Clinton donned her pant suit one more time. In this segment, McKinnon sat at a piano and delivered a moving version of the song Hallelujah by Leonard Cohen who sadly died last week. The last verse was improvised but captured what so many Hillary supporters were feeling. After the performance, McKinnon was fighting back tears as she looked in the camera and exhorted us to not give up. I hope you feel the same way.

LEFT OUT BUT NOT KNOCKED OUT

The day after Halloween, Nicholas said he wanted to talk to me about something. As we sat together, he explained that things were "off" at school.

The prior week, three of his friends had been discussing a Halloween party at one of the kids' houses around Nicholas. Naturally, Nicholas thought he would be invited. However, it turned out that the boy organizing the party had not intended to invite Nicholas. At that point, Nicholas expressed his frustration and his hurt feelings. This did not resolve the problem.

According to Nicholas, things got worse from there. His three friends proceeded to ignore Nicholas and not respond to his repeated pleas about why he was no longer welcome and why they did not want to be his friend anymore. Nicholas shared all of this with me with tears in his eyes that he fought back and never shed.

Obviously, I was saddened to hear about how these boys had treated Nicholas. Because the boys are only 11, I did not think this would be resolved on its own. Therefore, I told Nicholas that we needed to get his teachers involved and that I wanted to talk with them when I dropped him off the next day.

When we went in to the school the following day, we found one of Nicholas' teachers. We asked if she had a minute, and then I asked Nicholas to tell her what had happened. Again, as he fought back tears that he never shed, Nicholas told the same story he had told me. The teacher had been unaware of what had happened, and she agreed to get more information and to try to resolve the situation. As I drove away from the school that day, I felt gutted.

Here was the sweetest and kindest person I know being hurt. Over the next few days, we were able to get more information from both the teacher and one of the boy's parents. The latter did not seem very concerned and even complained that the school should stay out of the kids' personal lives. To this, Kathleen retorted, the kids should not be discussing outside social activities that are exclusive, invite-only in front of other children who were not welcome. The mom had no response.

In the end, the ringleader boy and Nicholas' other sheep-like friends involved in the party explained to Nicholas that they "wanted to take a break" from being his friend. I explained to Nicholas that that was their right but that he also had the right to be treated with respect and kindness. We talked about how one's worth is not measured by how others treat us but rather by how one behaves and treats others. We watched a video about kindness that was excerpted from the author George Saunders' commencement speech on this same topic. I think it struck a chord with Nicholas.

I hope Nicholas realizes how special he is, and how the pause in their friendship is those other boys' loss. 

Adolescence is hard. Hell, life is hard at any age. However, I know Nicholas will get through this and that he will become a stronger person with an even greater sense of self-esteem and right and and wrong. That does not change the fact that his pain was unbearable to watch and that I would have done anything to try and make that pain go away for my sweet little boy.