LAST FIRST DAY

Today was the last first day of school for Nicholas under our roof. The timing coincided with a visit this past weekend from two of my dear friends from Austin who were dropping off their kids at U-M for college. Needless to say, it was an emotional weekend for my friends who had to say goodbye to their kids and see them stretch their wings without them.

I still have one more year with Nicholas, but I was deeply moved by how my friends navigated the weekend and by all the emotions that overcame them. It gave me a preview of what I will probably go through one year from now when Nicholas leaves home.

This morning, Nicholas got up as usual, ate his breakfast, and got dressed for school. However, today brought back memories of Cate's first day of fifth grade when we first moved to Ann Arbor. She refused to let us take her to school, saying that she wanted to ride her bike to her elementary school about 1.5 miles away on her own. I still remember that brave young soul exerting herself and riding away as I stood in the driveway. 

This first day was different from other years for another reason - Nicholas now drives and no longer needs a ride to school. Before they left, like other years, they let me take a photo of them on their first day.

Then, Nicholas and Cate loaded themselves into the Highlander.

They backed away out of the driveway and headed down Heather Way on their own. Again, I stood stunned in the driveway, taking it all in.

I thought about how much they have grown and how far they have come. We raise our children to be able to handle all kinds of situations and to become independent and capable of finding their way in this world. Moments like today and this past weekend reveal the bittersweet nature of accomplishing that mission. 

I now have a better understanding of what it truly means to be a parent. To sacrifice one's self for a child is the easy part; it is letting go that is the real work and every bit as important as the sacrifices.

I was reminded today of the poem "What is Supposed to Happen" by Naomi Shihab Nye, one of my favorite poets:

When you were small,

we watched you sleeping,

waves of breath

filling your chest.

Sometimes we hid behind

the wall of baby, soft cradle

of baby needs.

I loved carrying you between

my own body and the world.

Now you are sharpening pencils,

entering the forest of

lunch boxes, little desks.

People I never saw before

call out your name

and you wave.

This loss I feel,

this shrinking,

as your field of roses

grows and grows….

Now I understand history.

Now I understand my mother’s ancient eyes.

Her words and the emotions they evoke tell me that she surely is a parent. I think my friends and I, too, now share those ancient eyes.

GETTING TO HOME IN PORTLAND

Today, Nicholas and I drove to Portland - Portland, Michigan - for him to take the SAT again.

Portland is 1.5 hours away, so we had to get up at 5:15AM in order to make it in time. Nicholas slept on the way, and his test was 4 hours, which gave me time to kill and think about a lot of things. 

It was fitting that I was so reflective since we were driving to Portland - the namesake of our old home.

Three years have passed since our move, and so much has changed. We are only now beginning to make friends and some roots, and the kids feel completely settled. Ann Arbor is a lovely place, but there is so much we have yet to see.

I had the very strange sensation when I was walking around Portland that Michigan finally feels like home. There has been so much water under the bridge and over the bridge with the storm of COVID and all its disruption. However, those experiences the past three years have made us stronger at home and at work. 

It is only through adversity and pressure and stress that true, dynamic change happens, and we have all changed in so many ways. However, what we all take from this move and its attendant challenges is strength - strength of character, strength of purpose, and strength of family 

I know that we would all be different people had we not moved - in good ways and in bad. I cannot predict whom we would have become, but I can say that I am grateful to have the life we do and to have such an amazing family to experience the past few years and live through this thing called life.

POWER-AID

Last weekend Cate's team competed in the Powerade Tournament just north of Ann Arbor. Her team has been traveling around the country playing in the National Pro League, so it was nice to have a game closer to home.

The girls were knocked out of of the National Championship in the group stage in their last tournament in Orlando last month, so they were ready to prove themselves. Importantly, the team recently strengthened with three new additions, and their power-aid has been immediately felt!

We won the first game 4-0 against a younger 2009 birth year team, Northville Rush, that won state cup this year. In the second game, we beat Nationals Union 3-1. Our third game, we lit Michigan Burn on fire 3-0. 

That set up the final - a rematch against Northville Rush. This time our quality really shined through, including a dynamic midfielder wearing number 11, our very own Cate! 

The final result was 7-0, and our girls were named champions!

It was great to see the new girls so seamlessly transition to the team. I can't wait to see what all they achieve this year.