THE LONG ROAD

Today, I experienced two firsts in clinic since joining my new institution. My nurse alerted me that one of my patients had died. Later that day, I had to tell a patient and his wife that his cancer was progressing and that we had no more treatment options to slow down his cancer.

Obviously, I have dealt with these issues before, but COVID makes these experiences so much more challenging with the need to distance, the inability to talk face to face, and because it is unsafe to hug or console patients.

In such times, our words and how we deliver them become even more important. Therefore, I tried my best to listen to the concerns of these families and to express the sadness I felt at not being able to do more. 

We often congratulate ourselves for our professional victories: a new grant funded a new manuscript accepted. However, we should measure success by the quality and quantity of our patients' lives. That is why we come to work, and if we are not moving the needle on that, then everything else we do is insignificant.

As sad as today was, I will carry these feelings with me tomorrow and each day moving forward. These tragedies are a reminder of how much more we have to do. I, for one, am ready for this fight.