THERE IS NOTHING CHILDISH ABOUT CHILDHOOD

My children never cease to amaze me, and they always seem to remind me that there is nothing childish about childhood. 

Yesterday, Nicholas reminded me just how challenging some of the "simple" moments of life can be when I dropped him off at soccer practice. Ordinarily, I am not the one to drop him off, but I got home early yesterday, so I took him. 

When we walked into the practice facility, Nicholas said he wanted to hang out with me rather than join the other boys who were playing an impromptu game of soccer prior to practice. I encouraged Nicholas to join the group that included many of the kids from his team. Nicholas looked over at the boys wistfully, but he did not join them. He said that he wanted to save his energy until practice started. 

A few minutes later I told him I was heading out and that he should go have some fun. He stayed at the fence watching the other boys and said he was going to rest until practice started. Mind you, he was plenty rested, and he is one of the most energetic people I know. 

That night I shared this anecdote with Kathleen. She said that that was pretty typical behavior for Nicholas before practice and that she was not surprised. 

It then hit me that joining in with that group of boys - many of whom he has been playing with for three months - was still an incredibly difficult situation for him to navigate. He must have been thinking: How should I behave? What should I talk about on the field with these boys whom I do not know that well? Why is it so easy for the other kids to be out there?

Not surprisingly, they say that recess is the hardest part of the day for kids. That is because the play is unstructured and one often has to join activities that are already in progress. 

I wish I could say that these types of interactions become seamless as one gets older, but the truth is that they do not. Navigating unfamiliar and uncomfortable situations is part of life - especially for children. 

We will do our part to give Nicholas the tools and confidence to meet this and other challenges. We will start by going to the soccer team's carnival this weekend. I cannot promise him that that, too, will be without uncomfortable moments. However, I know that once people get to know Nicholas and he gets to know them, mutual appreciation and friendship are the rule and not the exception.

Like I said, there is nothing childish about childhood.